your approach will push your HB to the women, no matter what relationship between your HB and that woman, your HB will not take care the women's kid, and your son is ASD, so your HB will not select to leave the family. The next step is up to you, if you become a normal woman and girl and provide some fun and happiness to your HB, it will improve your relationship.
Last but not the least, please keep make love with your HB at least weekly, it will decrease the possibility of breaking relationship, and observation from making love, will make you to know whether your HB is on your side